Terrible Twos

I'm still a fan of meaningless anniversaries, and today is probably the most meaningless of them all - it's the second anniversary of my starting this blog! WOW! Let's look back on my intentions from April 29, 2005, and see how I've done:

• I promise not to whine too much
• OK, I guess I've only whined about how I'm not going to whine on my blog
• I'll keep the actual corn discussion to a minimum. It's just a silly name
• Check
• I hope to soon acquire a digital camera, so that I can share photos of my scintillating life with the world. But, until then, there probably won't be much here.
• I think my awesome pictures speak for themselves...
• Corn
• You don't say?

Thanks for reading and commenting - your comments make this a much less one-sided way to keep up with all of you wonderful people.

And here is what I would look like animated

Check out Meez, and you too can make yourself look like a fool!

Also, while I'm here, I have one complaint to make. On Thursday night, my local NBC affiliate, News10NBC, preempted "30 Rock" so they could air a special on how great their crack local investigative reporting team is. Sounds like that episode of "Mr. Show" featuring the Car Wash Change Thief Action Squad, doesn't it? Well, "I-Team 10" probably is pretty much like that, except for the fact that they are responsible for breaking the story that people could get adult web sites unblocked at the Rochester Public Library, which led directly to our charming county executive threatening to pull the plug on library funding. So not only did I have to miss a show I wanted to watch, I was also reminded of that whole wonderful affair.

Jerks. Watch me do my little dance above in defiance.

Chaos, murder, floods, plagues...

Everything in the wide world seems to be going loco lately, doesn't it? Perhaps the solution is chocolate. But wait, not so fast!

Yes, I know, to add to the troubled state of affairs, another long silence on this very forum. Honestly, there hasn't been too much to talk about. I spent some time with my family both last weekend and the weekend before, with much food being consumed and heaps of leftovers being foisted upon me to take home. Speaking of home, I'm now the proud owner (at least temporarily) of a backyard pond, thanks to Ultra Mega Storm '07! When the time comes to sell the place someday, maybe I can convince the real estate agent to add "seasonal water feature" to the listing - think of the inroads I could make into the luxury end of the market!

Am I officially a "Library 2.0" librarian yet?

Hello again - I know it's been quite some time since my last update, but I've recently returned from the ACRL conference, where I was repeatedly reminded that I should participate in blogging. I had a great time visiting Baltimore, hon. I got to meet John Waters and was photographed with him for the conference newsletter. Yet another argument for never talking to the media. I also got to hang out and catch up with some friends from library school, which was great. I saw some fantastic animal sculptures made from logs, bottle caps and other assorted stuff at the AVAM. And, apparently, I learned that R2 D2 is back - in mailbox form, as seen above.

What else have I learned lately? Oh yeah, that punk rawk is officially, totally dead. Or maybe it was a marketing stunt all along. Who really knows?

Roman's Music 2.0

Well, it's finally happened - I've jumped on the social networking bandwagon. Now the internet can see what music I'm listening to while I write my posts! Anyways, check out my Last FM page if you're so inclined, or take a gander at the nifty enhancement I've added to this site, which presents what I've just cued up from my digital music library.

I've also been messing about with Finetune, which allows you to create playlists from their extensive online library. It's like making instant internet mix tapes - pretty cool.

Comic Con was most excellent!

I escaped snowy Rochester last weekend to attend the New York Comic Con. It was well worth the trip, despite the fact that their main sponsor was MySpace. I met animator Bill Plympton, and some of my favorite webcomic artists - Paul Southworth, Rich Stevens, and the incomparable Jeff Rowland. They all get my thumbs up for being super great guys. Also, R Stevens (who said my name was "powerful") was inspired to create the above personalization for me. I picked up some great graphic novels for good prices. I also enjoyed meeting some nice people from an internet messageboard I frequent (don't you judge me) - nice young gents and ladies who are sure to go far in life!

In case you are wondering - yes, there were people there in costume. Mostly Star Wars costumes, with a lot of superheroes thrown in for good measure. There was a very manly Wonder Woman there, which kind of frightened me. At first I thought it was a transvestite superhero, but closer inspection (as much as I could bear it) revealed her to indeed be a female of truly Amazonian proportion. But they were all part of the crowd - quite a crowd, too.

You ever get the feeling?

It's a strange feeling indeed to see an ad posted for your old job. In this case, it's a stranger feeling still that the job has only now been reposted, 3 1/2 years since I vacated it.

It's not a strange feeling to see Chief Illiniwek blow on down the dusty trail. I've claimed for years that a legitimate compromise would be to stop having the Chief do his little dance, but allow the university to keep the name "Fighting Illini." Oh, if you had only listened to me six years ago, U of I...

Front Lawn Art Critic

Greetings, fine art lovers. The proprietor of this aesthetically challenged and, quite frankly, uninspired site has graciously allowed me to pass commentary upon the above artwork, "Snowman." The artist displays a quiet fascination with the misshapen and deformed, perhaps representing the microcephalic as a brave commentary on global warming or as a badge of identification with his own mental illness. This sculpture firmly fits into the category of "art brut," with its mismatched eyes staring blankly upon the street beyond like a comatose, Thorazine-dosed patient. Still, powdery snow being a notoriously ephemeral and difficult medium to work in, perhaps this is the best we can hope for, rising in stark contrast to the doggie-mess splattered snowbanks flanking. The longer I ponder "Snowman," the more impressed I am - however, winter madness may also serve as an explanation for the emotions evoked in this case. At any rate, I remain

Your Front Lawn Art Critic,
A. Rodney Torkelson

Schmalentines

As I sit here riding out the mad snowstorm, I realize that another Valentine's Day is upon us (dammit). I think White Ninja has the right idea. Unique, functional gifts are always the best.

Or, one could always follow the route outlined by Beaver and Steve - monsters and dinosaurs just scream romance, don't they?

Well, at least I still have Katrina around to keep me company.

Like a tightly wound coil

Sorry for the long silence, but wow, have I ever been too tense lately. Don't know whether it's just winter madness or what. Help me out, blog readers - what relaxes you?

Farewell to Satan

This Thursday night marked Powered By Satan's final show in Rochester at the fabulous Bug Jar. Yours truly was in attendance, totally doing the mopey indie rock thing by standing in the back with my arms folded and wearing a black hoodie. Actually it was an official Diesel Sweeties skull hoodie - someone thought the logo was a Pac Man ghost, but I pointed out it was in fact a skull, in honor of the Man In Red!

The show did not disappoint. The mulletastic Worm Quartet warmed up the crowd with an excellent set. Then Powered By Satan took the stage and serenaded us all with tales of scrotum frogs (that link isn't quite safe to click on at work, kids) and Coney Island whitefish (no link provided - if you don't know, ask me some other time). We also pondered the eternally puzzling question, "if God did not want us to eat cows, why did he make them out of beef?" As some of you may know, PBS played Risley Hall's festival of bad music way back in the pre-blog days of late 1994 or early 1995 - not as memorable an evening as his farewell show, but only because it was a long time ago. Back when we flaunted our anti-authority cred, dammit!

The Century Mark

This is my 100th post! And it only took me 22 months. That ought to count for... something. Anyways, I enjoy marking the passing of meaningless milestones, so, well, here you go.

It's 2007

The end of my holiday break passed without much incident. I spent most of New Years' weekend kicking back in my slippers, as demonstrated above. However, it seems my sinus infection started to come back just in time for going back to work. How nice.

It's 2007. Let's be careful out there.

The corniest of holidays

Well, I'll be leaving tomorrow morning for my Christmas holiday break, so I leave you with a somewhat creepy no-flash picture of the Christmas lights outside my house. I hope everyone has a great holiday, and I look forward to 2007, who's motto should be "It Can't Possibly Get Any Worse." (didn't 2006 have a similar motto?)

Here's to staring down the latter part of the Crap Decade and saying "you can't get me down, I have blurry photos of decorative lights!"

HACK COUGH COUGH

So it appears I caught TB. Spent last weekend in a Russian prison. At least I got a cool tattoo of an eagle eating a bear out of the harrowing ordeal!

No, actually, that's not true at all. The only thing that is true is that I've had a bad cough for the past week plus. I had a little adventure going to the doctor's office yesterday, what with juggling my schedule at work just so I could go, being asked to reschedule the appointment, and having to wait 45 minutes anyways. The verdict: I have a sinus infection. So now I'm on an antibiotic for the next ten days, and all I can taste is cough drops.

Can you drink on amoxicillin? Our holiday party is tonight after work.

LO-COST MEAT

Well, it's done - my secret mission to the West Coast has been completed. Yeah, I'm still a little wary of blabbing about the details online. Most of you probably know what's up, but if you dying to find out, drop me a line and I'll explain.

Bottom line: WE NEED MORE MEAT FOR THE STREET

It is your old pal

What do I have in common with Grover?

We are both lovable, furry and OLD.

Well, happy 30th birthday to me.

Yakkin' about music

I know I've talked about my musical explorations a few times in this forum. My musical musings are usually met with stunning indifference - as opposed to when I post an amusing picture of myself (you guys seem to like that). Be that as it may, I'd still like to take some time to run down some of my favorite music produced this year. This has been a pretty good year. No fewer than 16 new full-length albums came to my attention (that's quite a bit for me in terms of new music). Here are my favorites and my comments for 2006 - the first annual Romie Awards, if you will. I may post about movies I liked from this year in the near future, but that remains to be seen (mostly because I haven't thought about it as much). Here we go:

Best thing to happen to music in a while:

eMusic. It's economical (at $10 a month for 30 downloads) and has a great selection. If you aren't on eMusic, I highly recommend signing up. If you've never downloaded before, this is an easy way to get into it. If you've been downloading music, well, get legal, suckers! For $10 a month and a little patience, you'll get most of what you want, which makes eMusic a better buy than cable TV. If you do sign up, let me know, because I can get free downloads for referring you! Downside: you may end up with more music than you want. Which leads me to...

Most disappointing album of 2006:

The Raconteurs, "Broken Boy Soldiers." I only listened to this once, I think. Meh.

Best surprise I found while poking around on eMusic:

Billy Childish and Dan Melchior, "Devil in the Flesh." Awesome lo-fi garage blues set originally released in one of my favorite years, 1998.

Best CD I bought for five bucks:

The Dreamland Faces, "Dreamland Faces" EP. An accordian and musical saw duo, the Dreamland Faces play 1920s style tunes with flair and more than a little menace. They recently relocated to Wisconsin from Rochester, so they aren't really local any more, but they do return to perform here often. I bought this at their performance in August at the Dryden Theater, where they provided spot-on accompaniment to two of Lon Chaney's silent films.

Best album by an old guy:

Ramblin' Jack Elliott, "I Stand Alone." I think this is an appropriate category for a year in which I face my own aging head-on. Yes, yes, I know, Bob Dylan released "Modern Times" this year. And it's very good, don't get me wrong. But Ramblin' Jack influenced Bob back when Bob was a young rambler, and "I Stand Alone" is worth it, even though Jack's voice is going.

Best rediscovery of a classic rock band:

Creedence Clearwater Revival. I downloaded "Green River" and "Bayou Country" from the aforementioned eMusic. Another plus for downloading - getting reacquainted with the catalog of the greatest rock band of the late 60s/early 70s.

Best new album I've yet to hear:

Joanna Newsom, "Ys." I've been told it's very, very good. We shall see.

Best excuse to spend too much money on music:

Tom Waits, "Orphans." Just have a look at the track listing. I wasn't going to buy this, because I thought it would just recapitulate stuff he's already done, but it appears I'm wrong. And that's gotten me excited. Incidentally, did I mention that my birthday is this coming Sunday?

And now, here they are,

My Five Favorites from 2006 (in alpha order):

Belle and Sebastian, "The Life Pursuit"
Neko Case, "Fox Confessor Brings the Flood"
The Decemberists, "The Crane Wife"
Sonic Youth, "Rather Ripped"
Bruce Springsteen, "We Shall Overcome: The Pete Seeger Sessions"

Of cranes and spies

Wow, kids - I am really impressed with the latest album by the Decemberists, "The Crane Wife." I bought it only a few weeks ago, and I only now listened to it for the second time. Though I think I need to listen to it more to get a better sense of the overall story (because I think there is at least a loose story connecting the songs on the album), I can honestly say that "O Valencia," "Yankee Bayonet" and "Sons and Daughters" are great, shimmering folk-rock songs - all three are near-classics. If you've never heard this band, give it a listen. I know all those indier-than-thou kids out there insist that the Decemberists have lost a step since "their early stuff," but it's mere snobbery. They've only improved over time, and they've especially improved since the great but not necessarily classic "Picaresque."

Now if only they would play live somewhere near Rochester.

Incidentally, I found this photo online - what the Decemberists would look like as Lego mini-figures. Check out the source site for more (my personal favorite Lego rockers - the White Stripes. Sonic Youth as Lego figures is just confusing - which one is Thurston, and which one is Lee? And who's the fifth Youth? They've been a four-piece for a while, right?).

In other news - last night I once again got to see a free movie in advance of its opening. This time, it was "Casino Royale." I'm not a die-hard Bond fan, but I was looking forward to this movie. And it's good, it really is. It's just too darn long. I was shifting in my seat during what I thought were two or three climactic scenes, only to be presented with a new twist. However, some judicious pruning would have helped earlier in the film, not at the end. Have no idea what I'm talking about? You'll probably just have to go see it.

D > B

Happy November, from gray and wet Rochester.

So, we finally get some funny comedies playing in the multiplexes. Last Saturday I attempted to see "Borat" on its opening night. I think every college student in town showed up to see it. The line extended out to the sidewalk. Also, it opened at only two theaters in town. So, now that "Borat" has expanded to a few other theaters, I went to see it yesterday. And yes, it's funny. The stereotypes Borat is playing to are Eastern European stereotypes, rather than Central Asian ones, but other than riding horses across the steppes, what other Central Asian stereotypes do people know? It was as wild as people say. However, I can't call it the funniest movie of the year.

Reason being: I saw a sneak preview of "Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny" back on Thursday night. This is your funniest movie of the year, people. It's so over the top, so un-self-conscious (Borat, meanwhile, is all self-conscious, all affectation) - I loved it. I've been a fan of The D for a while now, though. Explosivo!

But wait! I'm back again, just to say that "Little Miss Sunshine" was pretty darn hilarious too, and that came out this year. Darn superlatives, so subjective. I guess "Little Miss Sunshine" is a little different class of picture.